WOW, a flood of emotions came across me yesterday morning when I go up at 5am to get ready to go to the PD to travel to Washington to honor you at the Police Memorial. I got the two sleepy eyed boys and threw our suitcases in the car and rushed to the station to… Continue reading Police Weekend Washington DC
Pushing Through
As I sit at the field (waiting for Gavins game to start)where I got the last updates about you I remember how anxious I was and I remember pulling over in the little parking lot by the ice cream shop in the town on the way home so I could write down everything the Dr… Continue reading Pushing Through
It’s NOT OK
I read the grief book “It’s Ok Your Not Ok”. It was a good book and I could relate. It’s NOT Ok you are not here to help celebrate Homecoming week, It’s NOT Ok you won’t be working the Parade or the game. It’s NOT ok you are not here to help Gavin plan and… Continue reading It’s NOT OK
How?!
How do I go on, everyone is posting first day of school pictures smiling (which is wonderful and I love to see them) and inside I keep thinking, don’t they know you are gone?! How can people just go about their normal day without you being here?! I know that is not realistic but in… Continue reading How?!
Without YOU
Have you ever had a panic attack? I never have, until I woke up on Aug 3 a year after you left this world. I woke up about 5 am (the same time I left to go to the hospital a year ago to pray and hope for good news). I dozed back to sleep… Continue reading Without YOU
Last Report
As I look back at my spiral notebook with your care notes I reflect on my last nightly report from your night nurse a year ago. I became to know most of your nurses. Each morning around 7:30 your nurse would call and each night your night nurse would call. Around this time would be… Continue reading Last Report
Wake Up
I wake up, reach over to the empty side of the bed where you were for 30years. It does not get easier. I lay there and know I have to get up the strength to face another day without you. I get breakfast for the boys then go to your grave site to pray and… Continue reading Wake Up
The First Year Without You
Let’s Try This Blog Thing….. I do not even know how to begin or if this is even going into the site I created. I wanted to do something to share my story and hopefully help others understand or feel like they get it (if in a similar circumstance). This will be raw and real… Continue reading The First Year Without You
Widow Behind The BADGE
Blessed Are The Peacemakers, For They Will Be Called Children of God” MATTHEW 5:9